Finding the Positive

I just love looking back at the kids growing up and reminiscing about the good old days of baseball, golf and football for my three boys, Grant, Alec and Nick Murphy, and swimming for Laney Murphy.

I look at those old pictures and I just swell up with emotion. It is hard to believe sometimes that Nick is really gone from here. I say “from here” for a reason because I truly believe he is not gone and I will see him again. He just isn’t physically here.

nick kiddo 2.jpg

Regardless, it still just plain sucks some days. No matter what kind of good face or spin I try to put on it, it just hurts. Deeply.

There truly is no greater love that you can have as a human being than the love for your children.

When they hurt, you hurt. When they die first, there is no greater pain.

I am happy to report, especially to all my current and future clients, that I truly am healthy and back to work being the best divorce and family law attorney I can possibly be, which even in my opinion is pretty darn good. Despite all of our flaws, the attorneys and staff at Murphy & Dunn and the Nicholas J. Murphy Pro Bono Clinic are simply the best. We are the best because we care. We truly put people first. That does not mean we do not sometimes fail. We do. We are human. But we sure try hard.

Here is a great example.

Recently, we represented a father in a custody case for the past three years and he could not pay us. He owes us thousands of dollars. We already won custody for him, but the case still has a lot of work to do. He still never paid. For seven months we tried to get him to pay, and he ignored us. So this month we withdrew from his case.

An hour later after the hearing, he called me on the telephone and asked me what else we could do. He could not pay us and he told me he was sorry for not trying to pay us or getting back to me. He then stated that he was a veteran and he knew about our Foundation honoring Nick Murphy, but he did not want to ask for charity.

nick flag 3.jpg

It was the first time we heard he had a connection to the Armed Forces.

Even though he failed in his efforts to pay us, something told me to help him. I asked him, “Give me one good reason I should take your case through Nick’s Foundation and help you for free”. He started crying over the telephone and simply told me “Because I am a great Dad and I am doing the best I can to raise a great daughter”.  

And he is doing a great job as a Dad.

That was enough for me. Today we re-entered our appearance through the Nicholas J. Murphy Pro Bono Clinic and will finish his case for free. It is the 62nd case we have done in 21 months through the pro bono clinic. That is why we are the best. It is not about just being the best legal attorney. No one cares like I do and our firm does. That is Nick Murphy and God guiding me from here on out as long as I am practicing law and as long as “Murphy & Dunn” is still on the letterhead.

Our job is about people, and Nick’s death has taught me that better than ever.

So even though I feel sorry for myself a little bit every day when no one is watching, I know in my heart that God has put me here for a reason. I had 19 1/2 wonderful years watching and learning about real life and love from Nick and how to be a great parent, and I continue to learn that every day more and more from Grant, Alec and Laney. They are the absolute joy of my life and no father could love their children any more than I do with them or be more proud.

We take that same approach on your case. We know there is nothing more important to you than your kids. 

So no matter how much it hurts to lose a child, there is a positive in every tragedy. You just have to look hard sometimes to find it.

nick & dad.jpg

This article originally appeared on murphy-law-group.com and was written by Attorney G. Edward Murphy.